Psychologists from Turkey and the US studied how parents' personality traits are linked to the emotional state of their grown children. The work was published in the journal Personality and Individual Differences. The focus is on so-called vulnerable narcissism: a trait in which a person is deeply insecure and constantly needs confirmation of their worth. Unlike showy, grandiose narcissism with outward arrogance, vulnerable narcissism more often manifests as anxiety in relationships and a lack of closeness.
The authors, Elif Cimsir of Anadolu University and Ashley Hansen-Brown of Bridgewater State University in Massachusetts, hypothesized that such parents may seek emotional support not from a partner but from a child. The term "emotional enmeshment" is used to describe this phenomenon: a parent violates age boundaries and expects a son or daughter to provide consolation, resolve conflicts, or offer the companionship usually expected from a romantic partner. This is not the same as assigning a child household chores or care for younger siblings: it is specifically about psychological burden, when an adult's needs are placed above the child's independence and development.
The study involved 513 students, 266 from the US and 247 from Turkey. The average age of the American sample was 19, and of the Turkish sample 20; most participants were women. During the 2023-2024 academic year they filled out online questionnaires for course credit. Students rated their depressive symptoms over the past two weeks, the traits of a selected parent (mother or father) on a vulnerable narcissism scale, and recalled how their relationship had been before age 16, including the feeling that they could not fully live out their childhood.
Statistical analysis showed that the more pronounced participants considered a parent's vulnerable narcissism, the more often they reported emotional enmeshment in childhood. A higher level of such enmeshment, in turn, was associated with stronger depressive symptoms in adulthood. In other words, emotional enmeshment acted as an intermediate link between the perception of parental traits and current mood. This is a correlation, a statistical association that by itself does not prove that a parent's traits directly cause depression in a child.
The link through emotional enmeshment was found in both the American and Turkish samples, and there were no significant differences between the groups. Participants' gender or age, as well as the gender of the parent they rated, did not change the picture. What was unexpected was something else: contrary to expectations, the average level of emotional enmeshment was higher among students from the US rather than Turkey. The researchers suggest that in cultures emphasizing individuality, parents may rely more heavily on children, whereas in collectivist societies closeness is seen as the norm and is less often recognized as a boundary violation.
The work has limitations. The data were collected at a single point in time, so it cannot be asserted that a parent's personality is what leads to depression. Self-reports were used: students described their memories and perceptions rather than undergoing clinical diagnosis of their parents. The sample consisted only of students in psychology and counseling programs, which does not reflect the entire population. Finally, participants recalled events before age 16, and their current low mood could have influenced how they remember the family environment. The authors believe that future studies with multi-year observation of families and direct assessments of parents will help clarify the sequence of these links.